sometimes you gotta fight
It’s no secret that my husband and I went through some turbulent waters this past year. Our lives have undergone some radical changes from what we were used to, some shitty things happened that were out of our control, we got busy, David shut down (emotionally and otherwise), I got pissed and we drifted.
A few things happened over the past couple months that triggered the fighter in me to say HELL NO, I’m NOT giving up that easy. And I proceeded to pursue David to the point where he couldn’t run away anymore and had to face what was happening. As I told my dear friend - I gave him the equivalent of a verbal kick in the balls. I also made it very clear that I wasn’t going anywhere and he could be a selfish jackass but it wasn’t going to push me away.
Through many teary-eyed conversations and soul baring we’ve reached a turning point and are moving forward in a better place than ever. We’re working on making sure we’re pleasing the other person, prioritizing, making better choices and not getting lazy in all areas of our marriage (thus my recent sex posts lol).
Marriage has never really been work or difficult for us and we’ve always had a decent sex life - but this year we realized that there are times in life when you have to take stock of a difficult situation and determine whether you’re going to roll over and let it beat you or whether you’re going to fight like hell for what you know is worth it.
But the beauty is that what we have to do to fight for what we have is really not all that difficult and is actually a helluva lot of fun. Mixing up our sex life, spending more time together without the kids, talking more about our day, our dreams, our passions…you really can’t go wrong there.
However, it requires a willingness to forgive, give the benefit of the doubt, allow the other person to really love you without guilt or shame and trust.
There were many opportunities in the past month or so for either of us to give up - and if we had, I’m convinced that a year from now you’d be hearing about our dissolving marriage…the very thought makes my stomach lurch.
I’m so grateful for what David and I have and I’m glad we were both willing to fight for it. It’s really true that some things are worth fighting for.
